No good news

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The flashlight is on the speakers

I threw my Nalgene away with the diapers at work today. I went back later and fished it out of the garbage. Gentlemen, please, one at a time. There is enough of my awesomeness to go around.



Thursday, December 21, 2006

I want you to know why story-truth is truer sometimes than happening truth.

This is a true story about my daycare boss, Polly.

She needed to get a battery for her [or someone else's car] she called Napa, got Jeff, told me about it. I told her Jeff is a character. More things were said. I told her about how he tried to leave a girl, drunk, in the middle of a field because she wouldn't leave him alone. Polly goes into a story and these are her (very close to) exact words: (I love that I am a writer. "You writer types, you've got long memories." -Tim O'Brien):

I had some younger friends. I don't know why I call them younger, they were my brother's age (two years younger than I am) but back then they just felt really young. Anyway, we all got drunk at this party and I was about 21 so I was still new at getting drunk. And anyway, I went out for a ride with my brother's friend and he took me to this field and said if I didn't... (do it) he would leave me there. So, I did it! And it was great! I still remember the song on the radio [names the song]. Oh gosh, it was great.

WHO TELLS PEOPLE THESE THINGS?!

Really, though, I love that she tells me things like this because my peer group of friends don't tell me about the inappropriate sex they have. Oddly enough.
It made me kinda sad, though; I'm 22 and I have no oh my god it was amazing sex stories. I feel like I'm missing my prime years. Don't misunderstand me, I've had sex, and it was good, but where's my crawling on the floor "I can't believe that just happened!" stories? No making out in the rain. No making out in a car. Would you do it on a train? Well, Dr. Seuss, I never have.


Life update: I have.