Pros and Cons Paragraph?

In exact measures, how stupid would I be to pass up a job offer this month for a potentially better offer next month… based on my horoscope? It’s a risky move. The horoscope is right about 40% of the time, maybe. I don’t calculate all instances. But when it’s right, it seems to be dead on. I guess the better question is, how long can I financially survive on 20 hours a week? I’ll find out tomorrow when my direct deposit goes through. Theoretically, I’ll be making half what I did at 40 hours so… very little. Very little times four equals less than my monthly bills cost (before gas and food). Oh sigh. If I spent $800 last month, and I spend $800 this month and next month, I probably won’t need to get into my savings until month 3. I find it rather unlikely I can only spend $800 a month for the next couple months. I guess it’s possible. I’ve done it before. It just sucks. But what sucks more: operating on as little as possible or driving through Detroit everyday? I would get to buy a GPS, new shoes, and a couple new shirts while still paying all my bills and saving money. I might get fat. I might get mugged. I might get my car with my new GPS and my new shoes stolen. But at least it’s not a lateral move.

No good news

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The flashlight is on the speakers

I threw my Nalgene away with the diapers at work today. I went back later and fished it out of the garbage. Gentlemen, please, one at a time. There is enough of my awesomeness to go around.



Thursday, December 21, 2006

I want you to know why story-truth is truer sometimes than happening truth.

This is a true story about my daycare boss, Polly.

She needed to get a battery for her [or someone else's car] she called Napa, got Jeff, told me about it. I told her Jeff is a character. More things were said. I told her about how he tried to leave a girl, drunk, in the middle of a field because she wouldn't leave him alone. Polly goes into a story and these are her (very close to) exact words: (I love that I am a writer. "You writer types, you've got long memories." -Tim O'Brien):

I had some younger friends. I don't know why I call them younger, they were my brother's age (two years younger than I am) but back then they just felt really young. Anyway, we all got drunk at this party and I was about 21 so I was still new at getting drunk. And anyway, I went out for a ride with my brother's friend and he took me to this field and said if I didn't... (do it) he would leave me there. So, I did it! And it was great! I still remember the song on the radio [names the song]. Oh gosh, it was great.

WHO TELLS PEOPLE THESE THINGS?!

Really, though, I love that she tells me things like this because my peer group of friends don't tell me about the inappropriate sex they have. Oddly enough.
It made me kinda sad, though; I'm 22 and I have no oh my god it was amazing sex stories. I feel like I'm missing my prime years. Don't misunderstand me, I've had sex, and it was good, but where's my crawling on the floor "I can't believe that just happened!" stories? No making out in the rain. No making out in a car. Would you do it on a train? Well, Dr. Seuss, I never have.


Life update: I have.

Someone play the numbers: 532 or 0532 and then give me half the money

Number of jobs applied to today: 2. Fail. I updated my resume on all the sites though.

Since I feel like a life failure, I'm pasting old Myspace blog entries.

Friday July 21, 2006

I B&E'd my apartment today.
"Three juice boxes for six kids? It's gonna be like Lord of the Flies out there!"
But this is funnier.

November 14, 2006

I'm pretty sure the purpose of the GRE is not to show how smart you are, but how much you'll study for a chance at higher education. Or, perhaps, its purpose is to simply weed out those who are not willing to feel like a complete moron for 3 months before taking a 4 hour exam that they had to pay (lots of) money for.

One of the 2, man one of the 2.

Also, how does it happen that you hate someone for something they did to someone else? You know what I mean. You see someone and immediately you think, "Ew I hate them" and then wonder why. Hate by association, is it really worth it? I think so. Because really, how many people do you need to be kind to? Eventually the kindness runs out and you become a horrible person. So, in conclusion, you have to hate some people for no reason so you can like others for no reason. It's all about balance.

P.S. I think I just saw BGJ going into the woman's bathroom. That is so cheating.

P.P.S. false alarm.



Believe me, it gets better.

Sacrifice is the name of the game

Time spent at a paying job: 5 hrs
Time spent working out: 1 hr
Number of better/another paying jobs applied for: IIII

I now work 20 hrs/week so 3 of us can stay on teh payroll. They laid off approx. 10 employees. It wasn't a fabulous day.

Life fail moment: Not that money existed for this to happen, but if I had gotten my Master's in English (or anything for that matter) I could teach it. Not that I'd want to teach it. But I'd have a job that would pay decent and that would be good.

SYTYCD commentary:
First, general notes.It is widely obvious to me that the producers chose dancers who could improve. They picked fabulously mediocre dancers who will, throughout the season, become better and better. I’m not totally sure why they did this, but my guess is ratings. America can’t dance. America doesn’t understand dancing. America doesn’t want to vote for the “best” dancer. They want to vote for the dancer they like the most. That’s why Benji won. That’s why the douchebag hip hop dancer stayed on longer than his fabulous partner. It appears they’ve given up on finding phenomenal dancers.Nigel rarely said anything about the actual dancers or their performances. He frequently referred back to previous seasons and their dancers/dances. This is less for nostalgic reasons than for the fact that he knows they didn’t pick the best dancers. But he can’t say, “I expected you to dance that piece with minimal effort because you are a minimally talented dancer. Good job.”

Sadly, I can't find the actual dances online anymore so I'll just say this: Wade was the best.

Only one natural disaster at a time, please

Today, one of the salesmen asked me to "patch" them "over" and it remided me of the time Hank told me he had someone "on the horn." I giggled about that for quick some time.

At Wal-Mart, I saw a small child in a cart playing with his mom's wallet. He had opened the coin receptacle and was pulling out change then dropping it on the floor. His mom took back her wallet, picked up the coins from the ground, took the change he was still holding away from him, and put it all back in her purse. Despite that, the child was still reaching, trying to get the coins back. He wasn't fussing or whining, just stretching his arm out to get the wallet back.
I don't think anyone ever stops doing that.

Man hitting on me at the park: jeans; tee-shirt; mid to late thirties; one divorce (no kids); creepy face; hand waving downward so that if I don't respond it's because I didn't see his hand, not because I'm not interested.
Me being hit on at the park: black yoga pants, one size too large; neutral tan tank top (racerback); sunglasses taking up 1/5 of my face; earbuds; noticed waving hand and chose to ignore it because I'm not interested.

unmoved by Snickers campaign

So, my horoscope said I would be in a pissy mood on and around the full moon this Sunday. Honestly, I don't blame me. My foot has a fungus on the bottom, and a gash from a chainsaw on the top. I got whitening toothpaste in my eye. My job sucks like everyone's job sucks. I don't work full time, and I'm treated like a helper monkey. Generally speaking anything that occurs as a result of my dad leaving my mom ranges on a mood scale of unpleasant to emotionally devastating. The garage sale purge is about a 4. The idea of father's day in 2 weeks is about a 7. The idea of the anniversary next week is about an 11.
For about a year I've done everything I can to stay busy. I schedule my day as much as possible so I don't have to stop. I don't want to stop. I need the focus. All week I've felt like I just can't do it. And then I feel guilty for being lazy. Every little thing has been slowing me down lately.

I can't look forward without thinking about how I got here.





it just sucks