So I woke up day 1 at 6am and made JD get up around 7am which is 10am Michigan time so all the complaining wasn't justified as far as I'm concerned.
We ate at MGM Buffet and it was GOOD. I got 3 plates and a donut. Well, 2 donuts but the first one didn't have any filling so I ate the frosting off and got one with filling. With full tummies we walked around Vegas and the casinos/hotels for about 3 hours. I was pooped and JD's feet hurt. We stopped at this food court thing and got Del Taco for lunch. Del Taco is like Taco Bell except there's less tacos and it has hamburgers and fries. Plus, in a city where everything costs $7, it was the cheapest place. Del Taco became our home base.
JD got a beer at the bar in MGM and took it back to the room to take a nap. The beer came in a really nice pint glass and he was convinced he could steal a set of 4 and take them home on the plane. He actually managed one. The bar tender was Asian, but not regular Asian. He was a parody of an Asian man.
We found a place that had $1 Margaritas and beers so we stopped there a few times. I spent a total of $2 on drinks and $3 gambling. I also won $10 so, aside from food, my Vegas cost was +$5.
Side note: I made all these notes in bed and they are not in order sooo I have no idea if any of this will be chronological.
At some point we stopped at Walgreens and they were SO cheap compared to 1.) hotel or casino prices 2.) actual Walgreens prices. I got sunscreen for $3! I couldn't find it that cheap here!
Umm... after JD napped, we went to get the Zumanity tickets and walked around a bit of New York, New York.
Zumanity.... it's The Seductive Side of Cirque Du Soleil. When I bought the tickets JD and I decided if we were going to see boobs, we might as well be in the front. I had forgotten what seats we actually had and was surprised to find us in the 2nd row. The first row of real seats behind the "VIP" section couches. We were on the side of the stage. This was considered an upgrade. When I say we were in the second row of a Cirque Du Soleil show, it's like saying we were seated behind the stage at a magic show. We were too close. So close, in fact that I viewed the following things:
Bikini line razor burn
C-Section scar
The fake nipples (lame! if you're going to promote the show as "nude" I want to see nipples)
The flesh colored body suits (which were the most accurate I have ever seen)
The fake pubic hair poking out of the flesh colored body suits
Upon being directed to our seats, we were told not to move during an act or else we might get hurt
Never. Again.
Things I was a little surprised about: They didn't all have 6 packs. One chick even had some cushion for the pushin. Their storylines didn't exactly fit the acts going on which was a bit disappointing. I didn't really like the characters except for the MC and the 2 fat ladies. Everyone else kind of scared me. There was a sign posted outside that said if you didn't want to participate to kindly tell the performers. Well, people kindly told them, and they still forced. I don't like being forced to do something so I was worried with how close we were sitting that they might make us do something. I put on my best "back the fuck off, bitch" face and hoped for the best.
The good acts were the hula hoop school girl, the contortionists in the fish bowl, the dominatrix(er? ee?) with the steel ring, and the chains guy. The chains guy looked exactly like Mohawk Mike except 50 pounds lighter and more fit with an extra side of homosexual. The entire time, that's all I could think of. Also, I could see all of the safety features in his act so that made it a little sad. I liked the lap dance act too, although it wasn't very exciting. Just entertaining.
My favorite was probably the guy with the steel ring. He looked so happy! Me and JD were thinking that he got in the show because he had a marketable Cirque skill, but maybe wasn't good enough to be in an awesome show. Or maybe he was roped in by the prospect of boobs and signed the contract before he realized the boobs were all an illusion.
The lame acts were the audience participation with the 2 main entertainers. I don't like seeing people be embarrassed! It hurts my little heart! The cowboy. I would have kicked if he had made me participate. The bathtub (because we couldn't see it from the side), the ballet dancers on the ribbons. There was this cage fight where the 2 guys were fighting over a woman and then made out with each other at the end. I liked when they made out, but they could have utilized the cage better. It was meh from that close up. There were a couple of other random ones that I don't remember.
All in all, I don't recommend going. No offense to the show, it's entertaining, but if you're going to spend that much money, put in a bit more and go see an "official" Cirque show.
After the show, we went to Del Taco again except I got hot dogs for the 2nd time on the trip and was disappointed.
Our little feets hurt so we went back to the room for foot rubs and sleep.
Showing posts with label Las Vegas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Las Vegas. Show all posts
Friday, February 19, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Vegas notes Travel day
Well, I had been updating until we went to Vegas. Here are my notes and commentary:
I've never been on a plane. I've never even been inside an airport. So I was pretty much a 4 year old following JD around looking confused and scared. Of course the TSA can smell fear on you and yelled at me. More than once. I cried before we even got to the gate. (I later learned, there is no reason to yell at someone going through security at the airport. Thankfully, there is a Santa and he is an Asian man living in Vegas. Also, a lanky white man with a metal detector.)
Walking around the airport and drinking Starbucks green tea made me feel better. On our walk, we saw a man who looked like a French Pervert. Or a regular Pervert who waits at the Air France gate in airports. Later, he followed us onto our plane, and I was pretty much convinced that if I left my seat at all, he would molest me. I didn't leave my seat, but it wasn't too bad. I sat in the middle next to a woman who had never been on a plane before, and let me tell you, if I had been flying alone, I would not have been as calm as she was.
JD and I shared the snack box which contained beef jerky, cheese, crackers, "cookies", dried fruit and maybe another thing or two. It was only $5 and it was well worth it. JD chased it with a $5 beer. I played Bananagrams and listened to old NPR episodes that made me feel like a genius because I knew the actual answers to things. I was unimpressed with first class. It was just coach with 1 less row buddy. Not worth $1,000. They do, however, get drinks and snacks whenever they want. Minor plus when you consider the airplane potty.
As we were exiting the plan, the woman who had been sitting in front of us turned around and said, "are you guys getting married? You look young, you should get married." I'm polite to strangers for 2 questions. After the 2nd, I'm done. I've been polite to you long enough and now it is your time to be polite to me by leaving me alone. JD and I both told the woman we were not getting married at which point she began giggling about all the things a girl (I assume gender based on her list which didn't include blow jobs and home cooking) needs before getting married like "a BIG RING!" These things do not amuse me. I'm not the person who is going to elbow you knowingly (eh? heh??) about large diamonds, being good in bed, nice cars, or fat paychecks. I'm not actually shallow and I don't think those things are funny. So I was pretty much done with the lady and refused to look at her for fear of encouraging her to the point where she would hand us brochures for chapels and china patterns. JD continued to respond to her kindly.
We got off the plan safely, and got to the hotel safely, and thankfully JD is better at managing people than I am because I was tired and almost allowed MGM Grand to take $200 from me for no reason. They upgraded our room (because of JD, again) for free so we could have a king size bed. The room was in the West Wing and it was TINY. It was at the end of a mile long tunnel that became darker and more scary once you entered the West or Wing part. You walk into the room and you see the bathroom sink. No other room, or door just walk in: mirror above sink. To the left was the toilet and the shower behind their own glass walls. Which is saying a lot. It was really like walking into a public restroom and peeing in a stall. I was very discombobulated that there was no separate "room" nor a vent for the potty. I don't like people listening to me pee. When I go to the bathroom with someone I know, I left them pick the stall first and I go as far away from them as I can.
Don't even get me started on pooping.
Lucky I love my boyfriend in an open and honest bodily function kind of way because if I had been with someone else, I may have left the room to pee. As it was, I turned on the TV in the vanity mirror every time I peed. I'm sure that's what it was there for.
Las Vegas is 3 hours behind Michigan. I refused to change my iTouch time to "Vegas time" and my body committed to the cause by waking up at 6am-Vegas every morning. Which gave me 3 hours to be quiet in a dark room waiting to wake JD up. And wake him up I did.
To be continued...
(I know I'm laid off, what better things do I have to do that I can't update this blog in a timely and complete mannor? Three words: Obese Teen Pregnancy. You can combine them in many ways and TV has.)
(Plus, you know, looking for a job and trying to go back to school for free)
I've never been on a plane. I've never even been inside an airport. So I was pretty much a 4 year old following JD around looking confused and scared. Of course the TSA can smell fear on you and yelled at me. More than once. I cried before we even got to the gate. (I later learned, there is no reason to yell at someone going through security at the airport. Thankfully, there is a Santa and he is an Asian man living in Vegas. Also, a lanky white man with a metal detector.)
Walking around the airport and drinking Starbucks green tea made me feel better. On our walk, we saw a man who looked like a French Pervert. Or a regular Pervert who waits at the Air France gate in airports. Later, he followed us onto our plane, and I was pretty much convinced that if I left my seat at all, he would molest me. I didn't leave my seat, but it wasn't too bad. I sat in the middle next to a woman who had never been on a plane before, and let me tell you, if I had been flying alone, I would not have been as calm as she was.
JD and I shared the snack box which contained beef jerky, cheese, crackers, "cookies", dried fruit and maybe another thing or two. It was only $5 and it was well worth it. JD chased it with a $5 beer. I played Bananagrams and listened to old NPR episodes that made me feel like a genius because I knew the actual answers to things. I was unimpressed with first class. It was just coach with 1 less row buddy. Not worth $1,000. They do, however, get drinks and snacks whenever they want. Minor plus when you consider the airplane potty.
As we were exiting the plan, the woman who had been sitting in front of us turned around and said, "are you guys getting married? You look young, you should get married." I'm polite to strangers for 2 questions. After the 2nd, I'm done. I've been polite to you long enough and now it is your time to be polite to me by leaving me alone. JD and I both told the woman we were not getting married at which point she began giggling about all the things a girl (I assume gender based on her list which didn't include blow jobs and home cooking) needs before getting married like "a BIG RING!" These things do not amuse me. I'm not the person who is going to elbow you knowingly (eh? heh??) about large diamonds, being good in bed, nice cars, or fat paychecks. I'm not actually shallow and I don't think those things are funny. So I was pretty much done with the lady and refused to look at her for fear of encouraging her to the point where she would hand us brochures for chapels and china patterns. JD continued to respond to her kindly.
We got off the plan safely, and got to the hotel safely, and thankfully JD is better at managing people than I am because I was tired and almost allowed MGM Grand to take $200 from me for no reason. They upgraded our room (because of JD, again) for free so we could have a king size bed. The room was in the West Wing and it was TINY. It was at the end of a mile long tunnel that became darker and more scary once you entered the West or Wing part. You walk into the room and you see the bathroom sink. No other room, or door just walk in: mirror above sink. To the left was the toilet and the shower behind their own glass walls. Which is saying a lot. It was really like walking into a public restroom and peeing in a stall. I was very discombobulated that there was no separate "room" nor a vent for the potty. I don't like people listening to me pee. When I go to the bathroom with someone I know, I left them pick the stall first and I go as far away from them as I can.
Don't even get me started on pooping.
Lucky I love my boyfriend in an open and honest bodily function kind of way because if I had been with someone else, I may have left the room to pee. As it was, I turned on the TV in the vanity mirror every time I peed. I'm sure that's what it was there for.
Las Vegas is 3 hours behind Michigan. I refused to change my iTouch time to "Vegas time" and my body committed to the cause by waking up at 6am-Vegas every morning. Which gave me 3 hours to be quiet in a dark room waiting to wake JD up. And wake him up I did.
To be continued...
(I know I'm laid off, what better things do I have to do that I can't update this blog in a timely and complete mannor? Three words: Obese Teen Pregnancy. You can combine them in many ways and TV has.)
(Plus, you know, looking for a job and trying to go back to school for free)
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